From Zombos Closet

July 11, 2011

Book Review: Chasing Ghosts Texas Style

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ChasingghostsZombos Says: Good 

There are two corrections I’ll note for Brad and Barry Klinge’s book about their nocturnal exploits with the supernatural, Chasing Ghosts Texas Style: On the Road With Everyday Paranormal. The first is Brad attributing  “Keep your friends close and your enemies closer,” to an old Mafia saying.  That’s wrong: the military strategist Sun-tzu said it first.  Brad, if you want a Mafia quote, I recommend this one: “I know nothing, I didn’t see anything, I wasn’t there, and if I was there, I was asleep.” Even if Michael Corleone says his father told him to keep his enemies closer in The Godfather, the Mob didn’t think of it first.

The second correction is more of a needed addition to the book. Brad and Barry describe their experiences with spectral phenomenon, often citing audio and photographic evidence gathered in their encounters, but there are no photographs. I can understand audio being a problem for the print edition (it would be great to hear EVPs in the ebook version, hint, hint), but to not include photographs  seems rather silly, don’t you think? Am I a skeptic? Sure, to an extent. But it’s more a case of me being tired of the endless hearsay descriptions given on every Ghost Hunters episode, Ghost Lab episode, and insert-your-own-favorite-here episode of any and every paranormal show.

You know the drill I’m referring to:  investigators start investigating by invariably doing a walk-through of the purportedly haunted premises first, guided by someone who describes how he or she, or a guest or co-worker, has seen a full body apparition, or heard a disembodied voice, or was tripped down the stairs by big spectral feet. The descriptions are always so much more juicy than the investigations (although, I confess,  both do jive enough for me, sometimes). Brad and Barrys’ very first investigation, the Harlequin Diner (they took photos), and Brad’s apparition sighting of Civil War soldiers (he said he filmed it), piqued my interest enough to want to see photographic evidence. But none is provided in the book. Ouch.

Now here’s what I really like about this book: the refreshingly skeptical stance both of them take when witches and feeling psychics are involved in investigations. Asterisks appear by certain names so I’ll assume those names have been changed. Whoever “Celeste” the psychic may be in real life, her effectively simple (but naughty) spook assist in the television studio investigation, as well as those white witches who conducted a questionable ceremony–with burning sage–in another, provide a much needed Everyday Normal against all the EVP, EMF, and K-2 meter gadgetizing.

The best chapter may be Everyday Nutsacks and Other Disasters, in which we meet tipsy “Meredith,” who dresses for the brothers’ investigation of her house  in a flowing white nightgown, and “Sharon,” who says the spirits levitated and rotated her.  At least she wasn’t tipsy.

In Chasing Ghosts Texas Style, Brad and Barry describe their roadtrip to everyday paranormal, potholes and all. A short glossary and essential list of ghost hunting tools will get you started, but you’ll just have to find–and avoid– the potholes for yourself. This book provides a good business primer to do that.

How to Write That First Novel
By Scott M. Baker

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I’ve been fortunate over the past six years to be intimately involved with a writer’s group that has allowed me to become acquainted with numerous authors, publishers, screen writers, and literary agents. They have talked openly about the publishing industry in general and their specific genres, and have offered considerable advice. Over time, I’ve come to realize how valuable that guidance was. So over the next few weeks, I hope to share some of that wisdom with you.

“What do I have to do to be a writer?”

Write.

Believe it or not, it’s as simple as that. Writers write. It’s what we do. But you’d be surprised how many people forget that.

I’ve met several potential authors who have bragged about all the work they’ve done on their project. One had a detailed outline of their proposed novel. Another had 3×5 cards filled with biographical notes for each character. A third had a notebook in which he kept hours’ worth of research. When I asked them how far they had gotten in their book, they admitted they had not written anything yet. These people completely miss the point. Research, plot, and character are necessary, but not anywhere near as important as actually writing the book.

So get out there and start writing.

“That’s easy for you to say. You’re a published author and have plenty of time to write. I don’t.”

No one has time to write. You have to make time.

The sad truth about publishing today is that, unless you are a well-established name like Stephen King, J. K. Rawlings, or Dan Brown, most writers maintain a day job (or have a very understanding significant other with a well-paying job and a lot of patience). I get up at 6 AM, rush around to feed my rabbits, get dressed, and then off to work by 7 AM. If I’m lucky, I’m home around 5 PM. Then I have to feed, clean, and spend time with the rabbits–you don‘t own pets, pets own you; do chores and errands; and try to have some meager semblance of a social life. I’m lucky if I get five hours of sleep a night.

I fit writing into that hectic schedule because I love to write. I need to write. It’s my passion. To do it I have to make sacrifices. When I’m in full-fledged writing mode, my Xbox sits idle and my stack of books to read grows taller and taller. And I don’t want to admit to the number of times I’ve spent several hours cranking out a chapter, only to be greeted afterwards by sets of mopey brown eyes and furry dejected faces giving me that why-didn’t-you-play-with-me look.

Anyone who truly and passionately wants to write can find time during the day to do so. Get up an hour early or stay up an hour late (as long as you devote that entire time solely to writing). If you commute by public transportation, use that time. Devote some of your “down time” to writing. Sure, you might have to forego watching American Idol or curtail your time surfing stupid videos on YouTube, but are these really more important than getting your book written?

“Oh, come on. How much writing do you really expect me to get done in an hour a day?”

Let me put it this way. In that hour, anyone can write a single page. If you type in double space, the way manuscripts should be drafted, that’s approximately 300 words a day. If you do that every day for a year, when you’re done you will have 365 pages totaling over 100,000 words. That, my friends, is a novel.

So what are you waiting for? Close down the Internet, call up your word processor, and start writing.