Idiot’s Guide to
Being a Good Horror Movie Victim
(Updated)
Let’s applaud the hapless victims in horror films. They contribute so much to our enjoyment of their terror, their hysteria, and their blood.
They are sliced, diced, minced, blintzed, mangled, strangled, eaten, beaten, slurped, burped–feel free to insert your own action verbs here–and grilled and chilled in countless ways, just to make us jump in our seats, upchuck our popcorn, or tickle our fright-bone. They lighten our distressing job’s tedium, get us through our taxing days and all those tomorrow’s and tomorrow’s and tomorrow’s until death do we part for points unknown. Their brainless, death-attracting, antics creep forth in an endless and frenetic pace from franchise to franchise, keeping us happy because, frankly, we are not them. And we would never ever be that stupid, right? …
Idiot’s Guide to
Being a Good Horror Movie Victim
(Updated)Read More »



















