Zombos Says: A lot more fun and scary than being lost in a corn maze.
I can’t believe Art the Clown got his own popcorn bucket and Frendo didn’t. The selling potential for popcorn during this hayseed, retro-styled, filled with honey-glow lighting and humorous bon mots slasher, is enormous. Frendo is the clown mascot for the burned down Baypen factory that previously had been churning out corn syrup. The town of Kettle Springs (get it? kettle popcorn), in Missouri, has gone bust ever since the factory closed. Instead, a lot of blood has been churned out, flowing from the younger population in town, that looks for a brighter and less stick in the mud future that some of the older population is still mired in. So you not only have a slasher movie with solidly messy kills, you have a socially conscious movie that slashes back at those who can’t deal with needed change and just don’t want to. Both themes don’t trip each other up, which makes Frendo’s murderous clown antics even more fun to watch. Standard stuff we’ve seen before, but done with attention to craft, and the pacing to keep us and the victims running, is to die for.
Quinn (Katie Douglas) and her dad (Aaron Abrams) are heading to Kettle Springs because of the usual backstory that gets people up and moving to unfamiliar places in rural areas. His playing 1980s rap on the car radio drives her crazy, so we know the relationship is strained because of that backstory. Who doesn’t like 1980s rap? At school, she’s late to class, has a dick of a teacher (her words), and makes friends with the local young troublemakers stirring up the old folk. There’s Rust (Vincent Muller) the big lug, and the cool, good-looking, coterie of troublemakers including Cole (Carson MacCormac), Tucker (Ayo Solanke), Janet (Cassandra Potenza), Ronnie (Verity Marks), and Matt (Alexandre Martin Deakin). Later, after hooking up with some liquor, they settle around a warm fire and chat about the old factory. Playing a prank on Quinn with a fake Frendo appearance, they upload it to YouTube. Yet another reason why the old folk are not fond of them.
At the diner, pretty much the only hopping joint in town, Quinn and Dad meet the sheriff (Will Sasso) and the dour waitress (Daina Leitold). Both are sufficiently small town horror movie creepy. At this point, we know the older people in town are no fun, and the kids just wanna have some. Things get worse for them during the Founders Day festival, with the sheriff quick to blame Cole, Quinn, and the others for damages caused by really bad juggling, and he throws them in jail. The town drunk in the cell tells them “never fu** with Frendo,” which would look boffo on a t-shirt (just a hint to the movie’s marketing team: add this to the popcorn bucket idea).
Then the real Frendo shows up and all hell kicks in, squeaking shoes and all. First to get sliced and diced is Tucker (yeah, the black guy: they always go first in horror movies, it’s like a golden rule). Then Matt gets overworked during his workout and loses his head. Cue the adults, which includes Quinn’s dad and the sheriff, not listening to the panicked teenagers (another golden rule, but especially in 1950s sci-fi and horror movies). Of course there’s a barn rave, next to the cornfield, that’s next to the barn where teenagers where sliced and diced back in 1991 (a quickie at the start of the movie). So, of course, why not. Frendo joins the rave with his own brand of fun. A welcomed twist, though not too surprising, complicates the clowning around as arrows thump into bodies, a chainsaw chips more than wood, and various bludgeoning and slicing tools are handled like a Teppanyaki show. Meanwhile, Quinn’s dad is facing his own clownish nightmare, leading him to realize that maybe Quinn was telling the truth.
Those funny bon mots start kicking in, along with signs that the town is really behind the times: a car with a stick shift; a rotary phone; and bad wi fi and sparse smart phone service. Wow, practically medieval, right? One scene is hilarious: but I can’t tell you because that would spoil it. However, here’s a hint: it involves hands and the need to keep quiet when trying to evade a murderous clown. It’s a classic.
Clown in a Cornfield is a center ring horror movie that should be watched with popcorn (preferably in a premium, movie-issued popcorn bucket: looking at you, marketing people; and don’t forget the t-shirt). While it takes its kills seriously, and sticks to tried and true themes and situations, it’s just a fun, snappy slasher at heart. With a retro-vibe, it also takes a stab at social commentary (stretching Cole in a bad way to make its point) that defines the next generation’s feelings about this generation’s stick-in-the-muds mired in the past, with a few screws loose from reality. There’s also a marketing scheme in here somewhere, combining Frendo with a corn maze for one hell of a Halloween haunt thrill, but given the marketing people missed the obvious tie-in with the popcorn bucket, I doubt we’ll see it anytime soon.