Zombos’ Closet…a vast trove of endearingly cheap thrills, including movie and book reviews, and scans of his collections of cinema pressbooks, goofy paper-cutout Halloween decorations, and his amazing collection of Mexican lobby cards from B-grade films. If you have time to descend into a serious rabbit-hole of marvelous trash-culture nostalgia, visit that site just as soon as you possibly can.” (DangerousMinds.net)
Welcome, all lovers of the movies that drain you! Welcome to my Radio Spot Reliquary.
Many thanks go out to my friend, the ever-vivacious Granny Creech, for filling in for me and doing the spots for Dracula Has Risen From the Grave. I was busy elsewhere and just couldn’t fit it in to meet Ol’ Zombos’ schedule. He’s a real stickler about things like that, and I knew I’d be in big trouble with the old guy if I were late, so Granny saved my skin, what little there is left of it.
Anyway, in keeping with my original plan, here are spots for two more Hammer vampire treasures, Dracula: Prince of Darkness and Dracula A.D. 1972. …
Here’s a funny thing. I like to research the movie when I post the pressbook for it. For Wild West Days I decided to try ChatGPT to see how it would respond to my simple prompt: “Tell me about the movie serial Wild West Days 1937.”
It didn’t do well. Twice it gave me completely wrong information and twice I corrected it. It finally got it right on the third prompt. How it could have been so off the mark I’m not sure, but imagine someone asking about the movie who didn’t already know something about it? That person could have walked away thinking it was a B Western made by both Republic and Monogram, starring Ray ‘crash’ Corrigan, Ken Maynard, and Hoot Gibson. Oh, and it was directed by Louis King and John English. Louise Stanley played the romantic interest too. Yikes~!
Finally, third time was the charm. “You’re absolutely right again, and I deeply apologize for the confusion in my earlier responses. Wild West Days (1937) is indeed a Universal Pictures film serial, not a B-movie Western as I mistakenly suggested. Let me provide the correct details about the serial.”
So let that be a warning to you, as Criswell said (well okay, I added the AI): “Future [AI] events such as these will affect you in the future” and “We are all interested in the future [of AI], for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives.” Amen, brother.
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While Van Helsing and Dracula are missing from this Hammer horror, the story switches up vampire lore to create a cult of vampire worshippers looking for some fresh blood. Newlyweds soon find themselves up against the evil, but are saved by Professor Zimmer (Clifford Evans) who turns the tables on the cult by putting them on the receiving end of the bloodletting. This film and The Devil Rides Out are two lost opportunities for Hammer to expand into interesting follow up movies with both the Professor here and Christopher Lee’s excellent Duc de Richleau, and leaning into more occult-themed horrors. For American audiences the movie was retitled Kiss of Evil (for television) and heavily edited for violence. The finale is somewhat of a letdown only due to the special effects for the time, but the production values of Hammer were always well executed on small budgets. One wonders what the movie would have been like if Peter Cushing and Lee could have taken up their classic roles for this one.
The Ghost and Mr. Chicken is my favorite Don Knotts movie. Not great, but good enough. In fact, he was always good in any movie. With his rubbery body, superbly sculpted comedic face, and uncanny ability to be kinetic even when not moving, he was and still is always fun to watch. In How to Frame a Figg (pressbook courtesy of It Came From Hollywood), the last of his 6 picture deal with Universal, as Hollis Figg, he plays the patsy, then stumbles into his own salvation, eventually. Yvonne Craig lends a welcomed zest; she was always so perky and self-assured, especially in Batman. Speaking of which, I can’t believe Knotts never played a villain in the Batman series. He was such a natural for a role like that. The best comedians always could also do dramatic turns with depth too. I could see him as a Two Face kind of villain for sure.
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An enjoyable entry in the Sherlock Holmes series by Universal, Terror By Night is a solid 60 minutes of whodunit that director Roy William Neill keeps fast-paced and tensely mysterious given the confined setting of a “moving” train. Significant back projection helps maintain realism and Neill’s high-contrast lighting adds to the noirish look. The one failing movies taking place on trains or boats or planes have is the instability of simple motions of people walking or standing on something moving, sailing or flying; characters are always so motionless and stable while the normal jerks and bumps normally experienced in real life are not shown onscreen. The production costs for such realism can be high, but would be a welcomed sight. You can see a good copy of this movie on YouTube. The character actors appearing in the Sherlock Holmes movies were superb. To learn more about them I highly recommend reading Sherlock Holmes and the Fabulous Faces: The Universal Pictures Repertory Company by Michael A. Hoey.
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The standard “Don’t get eaten” plotline for zombie novels gets a nice gust of fresh air in Brad Goldberg’s Z vs. V: Among the Living. He also pays a lot more attention to the fact that living in a world filled with decaying everything, especially rotting people, really stinks a lot. Too many television shows, movies, and novels gloss over that point, which kills the realism for anyone watching or reading (or is it just me?). Breathing in such a world can be heroic enough, but Kyle goes one better: he insists on recording everything for a survival guide he imagines others could use. At least that is what he is thinking. That gives us insight into Kyle’s feelings and reasoning as he shoots, smashes, mashes, and otherwise tries to hold his nose through the daily mess of survival in New York City.
To liven things up with nicknames, he has to deal with corpsies by day, as he likes to call the dead, and vees by night, presumably undead blood suckers. Hey, it is his survival guide, so he can call them anything he wants. Going against the standard quiet approach to avoid attracting attention and more mouths to feed—on him—Kyle carries around a gun shop’s worth of handguns, semi-automatics and rifles to tackle the hordes. Not one to panic shop, he also remembered to grab the cleaning supplies to make sure his guns do not jam up in critical situations. The cleaning fluid comes in handy too when he gets wounded, though it stings a lot.
Goldberg makes sure there’s plenty of action to let the bullets fly as Kyle struggles in the present while flashing back to the past through alternating chapters. In the present, he becomes the protector of a ten-year-old named Chloe; her mother became a corpsie and her dad and brother became vees, so she needs all the help he can give. She is also a capable match for Kyle, using a grenade to save both of them early on, although she needs to practice her aim and timing.
In the past he was a television news reporter, watching the downfall of everything, who fell in love with the girl of his dreams only to have a rivalry intervene. In-between, the piece de resistance is a hell of a night as he is attacked by Zs and Vs, while fire and drowning limit his options for seeing the morning. To say this book moves fast and furious would be more than accurate.
The lulls are not much for rest, but Kyle and Chloe need to find food to keep up their stamina wading through endless corpsies and lodging each night to avoid the vees. It is in these moments that Goldberg gives us glimpses into the shattered lives of everyone by the remnants of those lives left behind or shattered on the floor. By this time, you realize he has a good handle on pacing: neither too long in the quiet, reflective moments, nor too short in the fights for life that occur fast, often, and described with tactical precision. The usual rivalries and petty squabbles among the living are here, but the daily slog dutifully jotted down by Kyle keeps them from overwhelming the hordes. Let’s face it: we read for the chomping and stomping, not the chit-chat; but darn if Goldberg has not struck the near perfect balance between both in his novel.
It’s a breezy page-turner but carries depth and emotional weight. His people are struggling to survive, struggling with each other, and struggling with themselves. We feel their struggles and that is a lesson in how you write a zombie novel. This is the first book in the series. Try not to hate him too much for having to wait until he gets the next book out. I am sure it will be worth it. Though, I do admit I am getting a bit anxious waiting already.
Staff book reviewer for The Horror Zine.
One of the noir movies I have yet to see, The Unfaithful‘s Ann Sheridan, Warner Brothers’ Oomph Girl (not a nickname she liked but par for Hollywood), faces postwar marital distress, suspicion, morality, and justice. She received the nickname in 1939 when Warner Brothers wanted to hype her allure and glamour. She also had some strong acting chops too. My favorite movie with her is Angels with Dirty Faces–or maybe it’s They Drive by Night–tough decision for sure. Then again there’s Black Legion, and…well, like I said; a tough decision to make.
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A more family friendly version of Clark Gable’s Red Dust, Mogambo switched it up by location shooting in Kenya, Uganda, and Tanganyika. While some studio scenes were used (you can easily tell the difference by the lighting, grain, and camera framing), most of the love triangle between Gable, Grace Kelly, and Ava Gardner is shot in the wild by John Ford. To make it more interesting for kids gorillas were the highlight, with supporting dangers from wild animals and nature. Theaters gave out a gorilla mask kids (or any adults like me) could color and wear. The film was a hit and reminded people that Gable was still a star. It also brought Oscar nominations to Kelly and Gardner. MGM put together an imposing pressbook. The front and back cover are shown here so you can see the wrap- around illustration.
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I’m not one for plush, cuddly, and pinkish Halloween decor, but T.J. Maxx has a fun selection that’s colorful and works with either traditional or new-ish trends for October–or any time of the year–Halloween joy. Given the crazy tariff issues, I have my fingers crossed that suppliers overloaded on what they could before the costs kicked in, but I still fear we may see less Halloween and Christmas merchandise this year. I hope to be wrong. I especially look for smalls: those animated novelties or ghoulish decor (not cuddly or pink! well, maybe just a little) that you would have found in a Woolworth’s store, back-way-when. Last year was disappointing for those items, so I look forward to be surprised this year in a positive way. I mean, where did those those Pocket Screamers go? As for T.J. Maxx, the standout for me are the hands holding pumpkins candlestick holders. Now those are bewitching and cool (even with the pink cuffs that work so well with the green and orange).
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Welcome, all lovers of the mysterious and other-worldly! Welcome to my Radio Spot Reliquary.
In late 1977 a movie opened which captured the imaginations of all those who believe in UFOs and extraterrestrial life. The sci-fi magazines of the time immediately began to compare it to Star Wars but, in all fairness, it was a movie of a totally different kind. This movie, set on Earth, appealed more to the mind…offering many puzzling events which led to an astonishing conclusion. Visually it was satisfying and the effects were great, especially the mind-blowing finale. It remains a classic but didn’t lead to any spin-offs or sequels, aside from a director’s cut or two. So, keep watching the skies…they are watching us.
Mysterious lights in the sky! Strange happenings! Strange visions! The Devil’s Tower! Losing your mind! Government cover-up! The Mother ship! D-E-C-C-G! Contact! Close Encounters of the Third Kind!
Hello, My Children!
Whew, is it hot! It is hotter than an overcooked vat of my Witch’s Brew!
I was just sitting here in my parlor when I received a phone call from the Radio Reaper. He was all in a tizzy:
“Granny,” he said, breathlessly, “have you seen Zombos’ recent posting? It is the pressbook for Dracula Has Risen From The Grave. I have some radio spots for it but I’m too busy to fix them up and send them to him. Can You do it?”
“Sure, Reaper,” I said. “I will be glad to. Send me the files and I’ll get right on it.”
He did and I did, and I must admit they were right up my alley. I wasn’t too familiar with the movie or the spots, but after hearing them, I was glad I got to write something about them.
They are not the usual radio spots I am used to hearing! If you have never heard them you are in for quite a treat. They are full of puns and I LOLed through most of them (that’s text jargon for those of you who do not know). I called up my grandson Big Abner and let him hear them and he LOLed, too.
Hee hee.
These spots are quite unlike anything I would have thought the Warner Bros./Seven Arts marketers for Hammer’s vampire movie would have resorted to so I had to look it up on Wikipedia to see if it was a spoof or a tongue-in-cheek feature. But, no, it was played in all seriousness…even rated “G”, which is surprising in itself. However, the one-sheet poster should have been a dead giveaway for the advertising tone. I didn’t read anything about what Hammer Films thought of the American campaign so I guess all was well, since it became Hammer’s most profitable movie (according to IMDb).
Reader reviews on the Internet Movie Data Base (IMDb) mostly agree that it is one of the best in the Hammer series. I haven’t seen it so I can’t attest to that fact or add my opinion. It is the fourth of the series and was made in 1968.
So, here are the spots, courtesy of the Radio Reaper’s Reliquary. We hope you enjoy them and get a laugh or two from them. If nothing else, they have quite a bite….sorry….
Now, on with the pun-ishment!!
If you have radio spots you would like to share with Granny or just want to exchange spells, you can reach her at [email protected].
One of the pleasures reading these old pressbooks is learning all the creative ways promotion was done before social media. In this UK pressbook for Dracula Has Risen From the Grave, there’s the public service announcement from a mobile van driving through town and the lighting of the theater lobby a nice ominous green to prime the audience’s mood. Then of course you have the catchlines: “Harrowing Ferment of Feat; Not for Those of a Nervous Disposition; It Will Fascinate and Stun You, etc.” Interestingly enough, those catchlines can work with just about anything these days too.
